I still can't accept it. Maybe I didn't expect that will happen. Maybe it is also too hurt to me. I hope this is the first time and the last time. Don't know when I already involved in it. They won't know what is the feeling cus they not me. Although we have similarities, but we are different kinds of person in this situation. Imagine if u are me, then what is the feeling? 4 years already. 4 years and 4 months have a big difference. Not so easily to understand it. Maybe I am not the main person so I can't understand it. Since that day I knew it, I was like lost control and quite emo. I was like dropping into the deep sea. I really can't accept it. I still think that whether I should just be normal friend or not. Yesterday no appetite to eat. From morning until afternoon, I kept on let myself busy so that I won't think about that. But it was tiring. Guess when I ate my lunch. 5 something=.= luckily I didn't waste the food cus I was too hungry at that time.

Today I thought I will be fine. But during the lunch, I really can't control myself. I can't explain it although she mention about something related to that. The feel came back again. She kept on mumbling, don't understand me. At that time I cried deeply. It was the worst. Luckily u understand me. Thank you very much for your caring for these few days. Very sorry for disturbing u and let u worry. Don't worry. Now I am ok already.