谢谢

庆幸自己能活到现在。谢谢老天爷让我还能活到现在。我知道自己身体很弱，时常带给别人麻烦，所以有时我选择不说，别人就不会担心。宁愿自己痛苦，也不要带给别人烦恼或困扰。其实伤心总是一时间。因为开心也要过日子，伤心也要过日子。不如开开心心的过。每次只好笑一笑，让自己不再伤心。有时伤心，我就会找人聊天。尤其是online.虽然我没有显示出我伤心，可是其实我是透过聊天来让自己开心。或许那个人不知道我伤心，可是那个人却帮了我很多。因为要让一个伤心的人开心不是一件容易的事。很谢谢一直和我聊天，让我开心的人。我会珍惜的。

A joke

Now only realise that a joke can make people angry. I can imagine when people angry what they look like. Very scary. Very sorry for that joke. I am the other way. Although I believe and people tell me is a joke, I don't have any feel. This is because when want to cry but can't cry then can say nothing can make me feel what. Although it maybe very hurt to me but don't know why don't have any feeling. Maybe hurt too much until don't have feel.

因为选择相信，所以相信

相信那是真的。为什么？因为选择相信，所以相信。想哭却哭不出。这或许比哭出来还要难过。为什么哭不出呢？我不知道。也不是第一次了。慢慢习惯了。。。

Very sorry for the joke

Very sorry for saying that joke. I know you won't believe me anymore. Please don't ask me to ask me guess anything today. I sure will answer without thinking cus blur blur and feeling like sick.

找不回

有些东西一旦不见或失去了，就再也找不回了。虽然曾经试过找回那样东西，可是就算我再怎么努力的找也找不回了。也许有些人会认为我没有曾经努力的找回那样东西，也许有些人会认为我不相信自己一定能找回那样东西。我只想说不是每一次我相信自己一定能找回某样东西，就一定能找回。

感觉

感觉是什么？人有很多种感觉。有开心，伤心，生气，失望，愤怒，沮丧，惊喜，幸福，担心。。。。前几天有人问我有没有曾经有过幸福的感觉。。。我说没有。其实幸福的感觉是什么， 我也不清楚。也许曾经有过那种感觉，可是我不知道那是幸福的感觉。或许我从来都没有过幸福的感觉，所以我不知道那是什么感觉。幸福的感觉是怎样的呢？

Worst

What was I doing? I did it badly. The worst thing that I did. Haiz...Very sorry to my group members. Regrets on what I have done. You all did it very well. Hope I no need take part in it anymore. Please...

2.40am

Haha..now only going to sleep.

Wednesday was a sleepy day. Maths class had quiz. I knew I did wrongly. Hope won't wrong too much. Physics class did trial run for practical assessment. My group did quite well. Thank you to all my group members.No appetite to eat on that day.

Chemistry class still ok but very cold. That time was raining too. Then, went to moral class. Felt like want to sleep. Very boring.

Thursday still ok. Woke up late cus had class at noon. Anyway, I still woke up at 9.15am. Physics class still ok. After physics class, I went to sunway pyramid with mokky, nicolette and their classmates. Have lots of fun.

Raining again. Today my feeling is like the weather.haha...Felt tired now. Hope the debate will be fine. Good luck to my group members and me.

Alomst forget to wish Mae Yee happy 18th birthday. She is one of my new friends that I met in college. She is a good and nice person. Hope she has a wonderful birthday, receive many wishes and presents. Wish her all the best, stay pretty and always be happy.^^I am glad to have u as my friend.

Tuesday

Tuesday. Today I woke up at 8.30am. After took bath and had my breakfast, I went to college. I went to library.I found it for half an hour but I can't found it. Haiz...

Accounts class quite boring. Luckily today I got friends accompany me. Thank you to evonne and her sister.

After that, english class. Today a debate was held but not my group. First of all was the debate on peer pressure does control you. 1st group versus 5th group. That debate still ok. Got one opponent team member has many gesture. The most interesting debate is 2nd group versus 6th group. They did a good job. The debate was nice until make us laugh for a few times. They very confident on themselves and say out all their points in a good way. 2 hours pass so fast. Hope my group will have a nice debate on that day.

Then, rush to chemistry lab cus english class ended 10 minutes late. Haiz..someone stepped on my shoes. Due to rushing of time, I don't care is who step my shoes and quickly went to the lab. We did an experiment.

I think that's all until now. Hope everyone have a nice day.

Scary

Yesterday night I suddenly received a message. The message very scary. Although I know that kinds of message cannot be believed but I felt very scard. Don't know why. Although yesterday night didn't have nightmare but not sleep well so today quite sleepy. Quite blur too.haha..

天蝎座与射手座

天蝎座很神秘，射手座开朗。我是属于什么星座的呢？我自己也不是很清楚。可以说是一半天蝎座一半射手座。我的理解是天蝎座很神秘。我应该是。不过，天蝎座报复心很强（哈哈。。。怕了吧！）。不用怕。。我应该不是这种人吧！哈哈。。我觉得射手座开朗。以前我可以算是很开朗。可是现在我不这么认为。虽然大多数人看到我时常笑，可是那是真正的笑吗？不是每次都是。可是我也不知道为什么每次看到认识的人我都会对她们笑。或许不想让别人觉得我伤心吧！

礼物

礼物。知道怎样的礼物是最好的吗？那就是充满心意的礼物。如果你用心地选一份礼物或自己制作一份礼物，收到那份礼物的人一定能感受到你的用心。也许也会让收到那份礼物的人很开心，很感动。我收过的礼物虽然不多，可是我收到的每一份礼物我都喜欢。每当收到礼物，我都会很开心因为我能感受到送我礼物的人的心意。一份礼物的价值不在于它贵不贵或美不美，而是在于有没有诚意。所以选一份礼物或买一份礼物最重要的是心意。

Very sorry

Very sorry. I know it is my fault. Don't know is i stupid or i blur blur today...Haiz...why I so late only realise that.So sorry if let u felt disappointed. Hope it won't happen again.

对不起

对不起，也许我的决定是错的。也许今天的错过带给别人伤害，让人伤心。请多多包涵。

错过

有些事情错过了，就让它随着时间走。不要后悔。因为一旦你后悔，你就会难过。不要自责。往前看。或许你这次的错过，反而会有更美好的事情会发生。虽然我曾经错过，曾经后悔，可是也无法改变事实。错过不代表是自己的错，这是代表会有更好的选择。

为什么是别人决定我的心情？

Haiz..为什么是别人决定我的心情呢？开心和伤心。。。最近的心情起伏不定。不知道是开心还是伤心。。可是我知道我很容易被影响。。可以一整天闷闷不乐可是也会有开心。。也可以很开心，可是突然变伤心。。最近发生的事情有开心有不开心。。不开心的事就睡醒后就忘了。。不只是逃避还是真的忘记了。。有时选择沉默，有时选择反驳。。有时选择一个人让自己冷静。有时选择和别人聊天让自己开心。可是我真的开心吗？

Going to be sick

Not feeling well...feel like having fever...Haiz...

Debate

Going to have a debate soon. Very scard. I never involve in debate before. This is the first time. Don't know what to do. Somemore need to wear formal clothes.Haiz..Hope it will be fine. Gambatte to my group members and me. Hope we can have a great debate.

Thinking too much

Thinking too much is not good. It will let u to be not happy or sad. Sometimes can let ur day not a nice day. Wandering why like this why like that. Sometimes let u no mood for the whole day. Sometimes think too much makes a simple matter become complicated.Whenever I thinking too much, find things to do or chatting with friends or listen to music or watching entertainment shows to let me stop thinking. Sleeping is also a good choice. Haha..After sleeping I will forget what am I thinking. If not, suffering...

Continue..

After went back home, find things to eat.haha..These few weeks I didn't take nap but always find things to eat after went back home.haha...Ate different kinds of chinese new year foods. Got groundnut, pineapple biscuit and some others biscuit.After chinese new year, still got all those foods but yesterday finished them. Haha...ate too much for these few weeks until feel like want to sick since last sunday. But now i still no sick. Hope I really won't get sick.

After that, I helped mum wash vegetables. Start to feel sleepy and blur blur. The whole night very blur and don't know what am I doing. So, go to sleep early cus very tired and my brain can't function.Guess wat time I slept.Long time didn't sleep so early already.haha..

Today

Haiz..still can't online. Quite boring when can't online and nothing to do.haha..

Today I get my account test result. Haiz..Not very good result.Never mind.This is my first time have my account test. I think it is still ok.Next time I will work more harder in order to get better result.

Quite blur today.haha..Almost want to wear wrong shoes to college already. Luckily I realise that.haha..

What am I thinking?

Yesterday kept on thinking since morning. Quite tired cus the brain non-stop thinking. Now I am ok already. I know the reason already. Luckily at last I can stop thinking by doing something that I always do. Hope I won't keep on thinking anymore.

Decision

I not really like to make decision. Thinking of it for the whole day, finally had my decision. Very shocked when she asked me that. I knew why she asked me that. But is that the truth?Haiz.. Seems like not that reason. Hope I didn't make the wrong decision. Very sorry if my decision makes someone get hurt or let someone disappointed.

Can't online again

What's wrong with my computer?Sometimes can online.Sometimes can't online. Very sorry to u and my friends coz I can't chat with u all. Hope my computer will be alright soon so that I can chat with u all.take care and always be happy.^^

Happy Valentine Day

Yesterday morning as usual help mum do chores. After had my lunch, then I was waiting to go ioi. Very sorry to mokky that I late went to ioi. So sorry. Let u wait for me for quite a long time.

First, we went to buy birthday present for jun hoong. We think for quite a long time. It is difficult to buy present for boys. Sorry for saying that. But it is wat I feel. At last, we bought a present.

After that, we walked around to find our friends and chat with them. Haha..Not really have much time to chat with them cuz they were busy working.

Then, we went to nichii to try some dresses. We didn't buy cuz it is too expensive. Suddenly u called me. Very sorry that I lied to u. I not purposely want to tell lies. So sorry.

When gave u presents, u seems like no reaction. Suddenly felt sad, felt wanted to cry. But I told myself not to think too much. Just be happy. Honestly, I didn't hope I can get any present cuz I just hope everyone will be happy on that day. Then, we went to supermarket to buy things to eat.haha..I bought kitkat. Long time didn't eat already. It tastes very sweet. Then, I went back home 1st. Very sorry to mokky that I went back 1st, leave u alone.

Thank you very much to mokky for accompany me. Thank you so much. I am glad to have a best friend like u.^^It is my first time celebrate valentine day with friends at shopping mall.Haha..quite fun and nice.

Wish everyone happy valentine day. Hope all the couples will together forever.^^

知道越多。。。

知道越多，就越伤心。为什么要让我知道？我的快乐真的是别人所控制的吗？我不想这样，可是也没办法。

Exam

My first exam really bad luck.It is out of my expectation. I did some mistake.haiz...Next time will work harder in order to get good marks. Gambatte to myself and others who have exam or in difficulties.

Suffering

Haiz..The most suffering thing is can't cry when feel sad. Why can't cry? If can cry out then will feel much more better. Listening music is the second choice to away from depression.

bad luck

Yeserday I started to in bad luck. First of all, I can't go to watch movie.Secondly, almost missing in this world. Luckily a good samaritan helped me.Thanks a lot.Thirdly, get scolded by someone. Next is can't open the window of my computer. Haiz...The information that I had to printed out yesterday had gone. Not really sleep well on yesterday night.Very suffering at that time. Now ok already. Luckily my college has computer lab. So, today I come to computer lab to search for information and print it out. Thank you very much for that girl who teaches me.I appreciate that.Today quite blur.Anyway, anything still ok.Hope tomorrow will be better.

Can't online

Haiz..yesterday computer got problem so I think I can't online for a week. Very sorry to u and my friends. I can't chat with u all for this week. If got anything, just sms me or leave me a comment. I will reply it as soon as possible. take care.Hope u all always be happy and all the best.^^

Sad...

Haiz..why so hard to find someone to accompany me? I want to go out ar...Now I realise actually I have so less friend.

Why always is me?

This is the question that I always like to ask myself. Whenever I get scolded or asked to do something, I will always ask myself why always is me..At the end, I still get scolded or do the particular thing.haha...I have no choice. Maybe this is what I have to receive and do. When I faced any problems or challenges or get hurts, I also ask myself why always is me...But I also have to face the problems, challenges and recover form hurts by myself. So, I just take it easy. Don't want to let myself suffering and non-stop thinking.

Happy or sad

Today don't know is a happy day or a sad day.I think is half happy half sad.

Today morning do chores.Then, play piano and have my lunch. After that, my mum fetches me to college. Physics class still ok and the lecturer very good let us finish the class earlier. I go to cafeteria with my friends.

After that, I go find mokky. Then, we have lunch with her friends. But I don't eat anything. See them eat. After that, we chat. Quite nice and have a lot of fun. Keep on laughing. Thank you for everyone who chat with me. At 4.30pm, they have malaysian studies then I go back home.

Haiz...

why like that 1?why I can't sign in my msn just now?

First day back to college

Today, I woke up at 8.15am. Then like normal..take bath, eat breakfast, go college. When I reached college, it is still 10 o'clock in the morning. After that, I have my maths class. It is still ok but quite complicated. Then, have physics class. Quite sleepy at that time.haha..After that chemistry class. 1st time feel that calculation is a bit tough. Then go back home.

Go to friend's house and teachers' house

Yesterday afternoon, I came back from outside cus had my lunch with my family at a restaurant near bukit jalil. After I reached home, I quickly go to take bath and tidy up myself. When I walked out from my room, i accidentally hit the door. My head quite painful. Don't care la..cus I was already late. Then, I went to mokky's house. Sorry mokky, I so late go to ur house. After that, we walked to hock him's house. At first, we were chatting about college and driving. His mum got talk to us and gave us drink 糖水。Quite nice. I like it.Then, he showed us the things that he create. The video quite real. After that, eu jin came then we played cards. Hock him kept on winning. Then, hock him's mum gave us eat 客家菜。Quite spicy. Although I not really like to eat spicy food but i think that 客家菜 is quite nice.haha..We also got chat for a while. We stayed at his house for almost 3 hours. We didn't expect that. Anyway, quite fun and happy.

Around 5pm, eu jin, mokky and I walked to Puan Yong's house. Before that, it was raining but when that time we walked to Puan Yong's house no raining already. We just stay for less than 1 hour at her house. Her baby very cute.She kept on serving us foods. Many types of foods until we ate until very full.haha..After that, my dad fetched us went to Puan Ooi's house. I 1st time went to her house.Her house quite nice and clean. She got chat with us while my dad chat with her husband.haha...

After went back home, I took bath and had my dinner at home. Then, online.

Last day chinese new year holiday for me. It was fun. Although today I have school but I still in holiday mood.haha...Overall my chinese new year still ok. Sometimes quite fun.